Sunday, August 28, 2005; 9:05 PM









i cant thank all of my enough for one if the best bday's in my life.this yr,it was an unforgetable bday.thanks for all the prezzies n wishes n love n smiles n hugs.i really did think THAT ONE someone so very impt in my life had forgotten my bday.but the person didnt.basket,i really though YOU had forgotten my bday.damn u!hahahah.cuz u didnt msg or call.OUCH!DAMN YOU!!!thanks for "D" surprise.HAHAHAHAH.mandy brought gary in to wish me.wahahahah.i loved my bday this yr.i love my frens!i love my frens!hahahah.awesome bday.thanks!my frens left,then i drank abit infront of daddy.hahahah.played pool wif zach n randall.wahahahah.i think i nearly died laughin.randall's shots r like power.i refused to break.hahahah.randall was teachin me to play pool properly..from the way i hold the stick to wear to hit.he put his finer at the ball,so darn scared of hittin his finger.damn funny.den a bigger surprised awaited for me...10 plus..someone idiot shocked me from behind!!!i hate u!!!.i nearly fell of the chair.u made it before 12mn for my bday.hahahah..thanks for the company n thanks for everything.had a wonderful sesame street cake and a big bouquet of red roses..17 stalks from mummy n a black guitar from my uncle.weeeeeeeeeeeeeee.hahah.
on sat...mad shoppin.bought tees.hahahh.i think i shopped till i dropped.i cldnt walk anymore.my sis n i spent alot.AS IN A.L.O.T.hahahah.i walked till my legs crampped.we walked n walked n we shopped n shopped.hahahah.



Thursday, August 25, 2005; 9:02 PM

1 MORE DAY TO GO TO MY BIRTHDAY!!!ACTUALLY,APPROXIMATELY 3 HRS.HAHAHAH.
I WAS ACTUALLY BORN AT 10.03PM.HAHAHAHAH.
i had my advanced bday dinner this evening at billy bombers.i think i nearly died.ate too much.choc milkshake.yum yum.hahahah.i was shocked to be greeted by a bouquet of pink lilies.MY FAV!MY FAV FLOWERS ARE WHITE AND PINK LILIES FOLLOWED BY RED ROSES AND PINK TULIPS[which is hardly available in spore].THANKSSSS SO MUCH.i cldnt stop smiling.ppl kept staring.wahahahah.envy!hahahah.it was so touching to be brought out to dinner juz bcuz my 'date'.[hahahaha] wanted me to open my present at 12mn cuz i wnt be seeing my 'date' tmr.hahahah.so swt huh.n for dessert,the waitress came out wif the banana split we ordered plus a birthday candle for me to blow.hahahah...pai seh but so touching.weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.hahahahah.lalalala.
i juz hope for tmr to run smoothly.no flying up tempers.no attitudes.no mood swings.juz a joyful,peaceful,smiley day.
1 WISH.THAT 1[O.N.E] WISH. <3
"WISHFUL THINKING.WISHFUL THINKING.WISHFUL THINKING.WISHFUL THINKING."
"I AM 16,GOING ON 17..................."



Wednesday, August 24, 2005; 8:41 PM

2 DAYS TO MY BIRTDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
lalala.2 days.weeeeeeeeee.hahahah.lets see how things turn out.touch wood,but if things arent good that day,im juz gonna tell myself wad fab days i had from fri[190805 to 230805].i juz hope for a smooth day.with smiles and laughter.i juz have to keep that one birthday wish to myself. <3
I will not make the same mistakes that you did
I will not let myself cause my heart so much misery
I will not break the way you did
You fell so hard
I've learned the hard way, to never let it get that far
Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side
So I don't get hurt
Because of you
I find it hard to trust
Not only me, but everyone around me
Because of you
I am afraid
I lose my way
And it's not too long before you point it out
I cannot cry
Because I know that's weakness in your eyes
I'm forced to fake a smile, a laugh
Every day of my life
My heart can't possibly break
When it wasn't even whole to start with
I watched you die
I heard you cry
Every night in your sleep
I was so young
You should have known better than to lean on me
You never thought of anyone else
You just saw your pain
And now I cry
In the middle of the night
For the same damn thing
Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side
So I don't get hurt
Because of you
I tried my hardest just to forget everything
Because of you
I don't know how to let anyone else in
Because of you
I'm ashamed of my life because it's empty
Because of you
I am afraid



Sunday, August 21, 2005; 2:48 PM

k.well,things were horrible on all the way till fri.i dnt wanna talk bout things before tt.
friday[190805]I LOVE THIS DAY.
rushed for trainin after sch.trainin was cut to 30 mins cuz he still foound weak to go full blast.it sucks,ive been sick since 060805.my cough gets so terrible at times.n my nose wnt stop running.anyway,amir was tryin to get my heart beat to slow down.hahah.i was panting easily.i was so agitated wif myself.oh well,had a shower den left to taka to buy food for uncle brian n mike.mum called me earlier n said this "mike's face lit up wen he heard u were comin down".tt made my day.i dunno y,but mike n i juz click.workin was always fun cuz i had him around.i was alwayss the e kitchen laughin wif him.its been like 2 months since ive seen him.damn long.i wanted to surprise them wif makan.den made my way down to bathers.so happy to see mike.uncle brian n i were a lil akward at first.lets juz say things have happened between the family n ive not regarded any of my uncles as uncles.but i know its wrong.my faith teaches to me love all.its hard ya knoe.hah.nefore i srrived there,i prepared myself for diff outcomes.so things were a lil stiff but i still put on a huge smile.in my mind,i juz told myself,i have nothing to hide.it wasnt my fault.n it was written all over his face.that guilty look.i chose to dismiss it.mike n i were talkin n talkin at the bar.my sis was gonna come down soon.so she said 6+.she came down at 7.i juz sat at the bar,laughed like mad wif mike..we're like buddies.,read my book,listened to my mp3.then who do i see coming down,after 8 months,i see him,Gary.i froze.wahahaha.i was like..."sam..chill."i looked,he looked,i turned n sunk myself in my book n faced my back.i dunno.i normally talked to him normally,but its been so long.hahahah.my sis finally came down from her office after wad seems eternity.n she is talkin to him.she n him are like best friends.bleah.she comes n doesnt recognise me at first.hahah.tt was the joke.i told her bout wad happened me n Gary n she laughed.den she says "u want some of Gary's drink?Gary gave it to me."i wanted to floor to swallow me up.but the drink was damn nice.eh..white whine spritzer?its white wine n 7 up.SHIOK.gary's drink.hahahah.my sis was buyin her team drinks,so stayed lil longer den we left.uncle brian n i were perfectly fine after tt.he asked me if i wanted a mp3 for my bday.WOW!heh.so,mandy n i walked to tanjong pagar station cuz we were gonna meet mum n dad at tanah merah.n guess who bump into.Randall.ive heard bout this guy from my sis.she knows himi wnt go into details except he is 19.n his story is sad.he works at bathers now.my gosh.he's cute.e funny part,i was checkin him out before i realised tt it was him.he was wif his younger bro.n they spot my sis n they were like "hey!hey!"..like wonderful friends.n i put the puzzel together in my head.cute guy,mandy knows him.it must be randall.hahah..true enough."sam..this is randall n douglas.".."randall,douglas,this is my sister,samantha"...i juz smiled n said hi!wah....his smile..im still thinkin bout it now.his eye brows remind me of nick.hhahahah.said our goodbyes,i ran away where they could not see me n turned to my sis n let out a silent scream.hahahah.she nearly died laughin.my gosh,H.O.T!hahah.wen my sis talked to me bout him before,i was like "mmm..yeah..ok.yah".now,hahah.lalalalala.talked to my sis bout lots of things on the train.LOTS.seems like she n i were in the same position before.heh.it was a gd talk.we ended havin dinner at asta fresca at the airport cuz andy was comin back today n mandy was surprising him.juz as im bout to enter pasta fresca,i see a familiar face.i smiled but e person didnt smille back.i felt like a fool cuz i got the wrong person.basket,i didnt get the wrong person.it was edwin,cat class fella,ive not seen him since lasst yr.hah.we talked n caught up.his parents n brothers were all there.his bros were goin to london.we talked n talked.long time no see him.well,picked andy n it was so cute to my sis to happy to hav her man back.hahah.i came home n cldnt believe wad a day ive had.mum was smilin also.she said "good day huh".i nearly died laughin.she loves diturbin me.but i love her!!!!
saturday[200805]
trainin at 10am.n it was cut to 30mins again cuz i wasnt fit enough.lets juz say,i spend the whole day wif myself.how does tt sound?i never thought i wld do tt,but i did.n i enjoyed myself throughly.i pampered myself.heh.after trainin,showered n headed to parkway,i bought some things.=D...den wen to roxy square n pampered myself.hehe.took a cabby home.i felt to good.it was nice juz bein by myself.so much has happened,i juz needed my own space.juz walkin n shoppin wif my music in my ears.got home n showed my mum wad i bought.hahah..shld hav seen her face.."wow.."hhahah.i juz chilled yest.the biggest joke,i was so engrossed in readin my book tt i didnt know i was readin from 111pm till 5am this mornin.i nearly died wen i saw the clock this mornin.i have to be up in 2hr n 30mins time.but i wasnt feelin tired.i felt revived.hahahah.
sunday[210805]
i had no prob gettin up.tt is so weird.n im not havin my sunday afternoon nap.tts weird.im normally shageed after teaching.class was fun today.ah..there r such lil rascals at times but i love them all.had meetin after class,i nearly died laughin wif some of the teachers.i was like the only young one there.i sat beside mum n my pri 1 teacher.so cool.11 yrs ago,she taught me n now,we're in the same meetin.heh.i love her so much.my confi teacher passes chocs to me from the end of the class.hahah.its weird bein in the same meetin wif all of them but its cool cuz i kept my promise of giving back to e church after confirmation last yr.but i told mum,i think im gonna take a break nxt yr,i wanna do stuff.i dunno wad yet but stuff.hahahah.hmmm,edwin messaged,he wants to go study tmr.im goin.but i have no idea wad time orals finish tmr.english o level orals tmr!!!!!lalalala.pray!hhahah.
5 DAYS TO MY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Wednesday, August 17, 2005; 11:55 PM

YOU KNOW WHAT...FUCK YOU!
AFTER ALL THESE MONTHS OF ME SUFFERING,I FIND OUT YESTERDAY SOMETHING YOU SAID ABOUT ME.
I GUESS YOU DIDN'T THINK IT WILL COME BACK TO MY EARS DID YOU?
WELL,IT DID,
HOW DARE YOU SAY THAT ABOUT ME?
TELL ME WHAT I HAVE EVER DONE TO MAKE YOU MISERABLE?
I CRACKED MY BRAIN LAST NIGHT ALL THE WAY TILL NOW.
I KEPT ASKIN MYSELF IF I WAS AT FAULT?
I NEVER DID ANYTHING TO YOU.NEVER!
AND HOW DO YOU REPAY ME?
I HAVE NEVER ASKED ANYTHING FROM YOU EXCEPT YOUR FRIENDSHIP.
ONE CALL FROM YOU AND I PRATICALLY FLEW TO WHERE YOU WERE.
WHEN YOU NEEDED ME,I WAS THERE.
LATE NIGHT CALLS FROM YOU WHILE I WAS ASLEEP.I DIDNT CARE BOUT MY SLEEP.I STILL ENTERTAINED YOU WHEN YOU WERE BORED.OR DID YOU CALL CAUSE YOU FELT LIKE YOU WERE OBLIGATED TO DO SO?
I HAVE NOT CRIED SO BADLY FOR A LONG TIME UNTIL LAST NIGHT.
WHAT HAVE I DONE TO DESERVE WHAT YOU HAVE SAID ABOUT ME?
TELL IT TO MY FACE.
WHAT YOU SAID HURT REALLY BADLY.
IT CRUSHED ME.
BUT OVER THE HOURS TODAY,I BEGAN TO THINK CLEARLY.
WHY SHOULD I WASTE MY TIME ON YOU?
I SHOULDN'T HAVE FOR THE PAST 9 MONTHS.
I SHOULDN'T HAVE FROM THE START SINCE I WAS NEVER ANYTHING TO YOU.
DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY PEOPLE HATED YOU?I STILL STUCK UP FOR YOU.
DO YOU KNOW THAT?I GUESS NOT.
I CHOSE YOU OVER MY FRIENDS.AFTER ALL THE HURT YOU HAVE CAUSED ME,I STILL STUCK UP FOR YOU AND I ALWAYS TALKED ABOUT YOU HIGHLY.I ALWAYS PROTECTED YOU.PEOPLE TRIED TO PUT YOU DOWN RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY FACE AND I STUCK UP FOR YOU.
AM I FEEDING YOUR EGO ENOUGH?
HOW DARE YOU SAY THAT?
I MIGHT HAVE MADE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE SAYING THAT YOUR SUCH A WONDERUL PERSON AFTER I FOUND OUT WHAT YOU SAID ABOUT ME.I TOLD YOU STRAIGHT IN YOUR FACE THAT YOU ARE ONE HELL OF A WONDERFUL PERSON.OPEN UP YOUR EYES AND SEE WHAT JOY YOU BRING TO ME.OR IT MAY NOT BE A MISTAKE.I DONT KNOW.YOU KNOW YOURSELF BETTER THAN ANYONE ESLE.YOU JUDGE FOR YOURSELF.IF WHAT YOU SAID HAD NOT REACHED MY EARS,I WOULDNT EVER BE CONSIDERING THAT IT WAS A MISTAKE.
WHY SHOULD I GO ON LOVING YOU WHEN YOU SAID SOMETHING THAT KILLED ME?
WHY GO ONE LOVING SOMEONE WHO ONLY HURTS YOU?
LET'S SEE ONE DAY IF THE TABLES ARE TURNED AND YOU GET TO ACTUALLY FEEL THE PHYSICAL,MENTAL AND EMOTIONAL HURT YOU PUT ME THROUGH.
LET'S SEE ONE DAY ALSO IF YOU GET A TASTE OF YOUR OWN MEDICINE.
IM NOT A REVENGEFUL PERSON.AND IM NOT SEEKING REVENGE.
BUT WHAT YOU SAID,YOU DON'T KNOW THE EFFECT IT HAD ON ME.
TO THINK THAT I THOUGHT THAT YOU WERE AN ANGEL SENT TO ME TO BRIGHTEN UP MY DAYS.
HOW FOOLISH OF ME WHEN THAT ANGEL PERSONA WAS JUST A DISGUISE.
I LOVE YOU.I DONT DENY THAT FACT.BUT FROM YESTERDAY TILL TODAY.YOU NUMBED MY HEART AND YOU BROKE ME INTO PIECES.
AND I SERIOUSLY THINK THAT I JUST DONT FEEL THE LOVE I HAVE FOR YOU ANYMORE.
NOT THAT YOU LOSE OUT FROM THIS BECAUSE YOU ARE ALREADY LOVED BY ANOTHER.
THE HURT IM FEELING IS TOO STRONG.
IF I DIDNT HAVE A HEART,I WOULD HAVE SLAPPED YOU.
BUT I HAVE A HEART.
I THINK ABOUT PEOPLE'S FEELINGS.
YOU LACK EMPATHY.
YOUR INSENSATIVE.
BUT, I ACCEPT YOUR IMPERFECTIONS.
I LOVE YOU FOR WHO YOU ARE.INCLUDING ALL YOUR IMPERFECTIONS.I NEVER SCRUTINISED THEM.I ACCEPTED YOU FOR WHAT YOU ARE.
YOU ARE WHO YOU ARE..PEOPLE DONT CHANGE OVERNIGHT.
NO ONE IS PERFECT BUT THE LEAST YOU COULD DO WAS WATCH WHAT YOU HAVE SAID.
AND IF WHAT YOU SAID IS REALLY TRULY HOW YOU FELT,I HAVE NO COMMENTS BUT TO SAY,I MADE A HUGE MISTAKE IN ALLOWING YOU INTO MY LIFE.BECAUSE THE TRUTH IS,YOU HAVE CAUSED ME SO MUCH PAIN AND SUFFERING BUT I STILL WANTED YOU AROUND.
BUT I THINK THE TIME HAS COME WHEN I FINALLY REALIZE THAT I HAVE BEEN TAKEN ADVANTAGE OF IN EVERY POSSIBLE WAY. I WAS AWARE OF IT THE WHOLE TIME BUT I JUST OVERLOOKED IT.BUT I CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE.YOU HAVE DRAINED ME IN EVERY POSSIBLE WAY.
I'VE HAD WONDERFUL TIMES WITH YOU.MEMORIES THAT WILL LAST FOREVER.
THANK YOU FOR THE JOY THAT YOU HAVE BROUGHT INTO MY LIFE.AND THANK YOU FOR HELPING INMY STUDIES AND OTHER STUFF.
DONT GET IT WRONG,I APPRECIATE ALL THE THINGS YOU HAVE DONE FOR ME.
THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
BUT WHY AM I WASTING TIME ON YOU.
YOU,SOMEONE WHO SAID SOMETHING SO HURTING AND SOMEONE WHO FROM THE START NEVER FELT A THING BUT ENJOYED USING ME AS A TOY.
HOPE YOU HAD FUN.
BECAUSE I GAVE YOU THE BEST OF BOTH WORLDS.
HONESTLY,IM STILL IN SHOCK THAT YOU SAID THAT.
WHAT HAPPENED TO THE BOY I KNEW?
HAVE YOU CHANGED FOR THE WORST?
I DUNNO.YOU ANSWER TO THAT.

I TORE UP PHOTOS OF YOU AND I THIS EVENING.
I ACTUALLY DID THAT.
NO MATTER HOW ANGRY I WAS WITH YOU,I COULD NOT BRING MYSELF TO DO THAT.
BUT THIS TIME,I TORE IT UP IN SUCH SMALL PIECES AND IT WENT STRAIGHT DOWN THE RUBBISH,OUT OF MY HOUSE.IM NOT FILLED WITH ANGER.I DONT FEEL ANGRY.I JUST FEEL EXTREMELY HURT.
A LOVED ONE WITNESS WHAT I HAD DONE TO THE PICTURES AND THE PERSON WAS SHOCKED AND IN DISBELIEVE.THE PERSON JUST STARED AT ME WITH HER MOUTH OPEN AND LOOKED AT ME,SPEECHLESS.I ACTUALLY HEARD A GASP OF SHOCK AND A SILENT "WHAT?"
YOU HAVE HURT ME SO BADLY.IM IN PIECES AND YOU LEFT A DEEP SCAR IN MY HEART.
BUT I FORGIVE YOU.



Friday, August 12, 2005; 9:26 PM

12 august 2005

got back my mt o level results.flunked it.i know i seem not to care bout mt.but i do care.i put in the most effort this time n i got an f9.its sad.its irritating.im juz not lettin go of this anger in me.well,there's nothing i can say that can change my grade now can i?sigh.it is demoralising lookin at a f9 staring at ur face.its puttin me down.argh!




lets see,im turnin 17 in exactly in 2 weeks.14 days to my bday.n somehow,im not feelin anything.



the pain you have caused me,
you will never know.
the amount of tears i cry for you every night,
you will never know.
the love that burns for you and only for you in my heart,
you will never know.




9 months today.9 months since the day i woke up and told myself.nope,im not giving up..not givin up on losing YOU.since the start of this decision,i knew it was gonna be tough.its tougher then expected.i dnt know how i hav been pulling thru these 9 months.there isnt a single day that goes by when i dont go on hurting.and at the end of the day,i dnt know if it is worth it atl all?this may be the biggest mistake i make in my life.the pain that its in my heart,its unbearable at times.like now,it hurts so bad.when i see,hear or smell things which remind me of YOU.i will juz drift away to memory land and replay all the wonderful times i had wif YOU.it's so tough stayin strong at times.but wad choice do i have?none.i juz got to keep on pretending that everything's fine and im fine.when everything is not fine and when im far from fine.loving you in silence is tough.so many times i ask myself,why bother?i can never come wif an answer.but i knoe at the end of the day,i knoe i love you.you are not mine n yet i love you so dearly.since the day i lost you,i lost a part of myself.i knoe it for a fact.im missing a part of me.this time last year,i was probably the happiest girl ever to walk this earth.how time flies.i need to find that missin part of me.i feel so empty.so liveless.so souless without that part of me.




A LETTER TO MY HEART:
Dear heart, there is something I must tell you.Something sad and so hard for me to say.For I know how much you always loved him.And how you always hoped that he'd come back someday.
But day after day my hopes grow dimmer.As I watched life and love passing me by.And the life I live is empty and so lonely.But you just lived for him and slowly let me die.
You know he left me for another.So give him up, let him go, let it be.Dear heart, if you won't stop beating for him.Then dear heart, stop beating for me.


love always,
Sam <3



Tuesday, August 09, 2005; 9:59 PM

jo.rach.me [in the cab to town.sa was in front.]
me.lisa[sweetie]
5.2 peepz with mr tan and mrs stevenson
me.dee.jo
me.rachie[boo boo]
me.ade[hubby]

me.karen[partner]
me.jo[stead]
shellen.sharon.mad.wei wei.seah.me.jia yi
seah.me[dearie]

mad.seah.me.wei wei
muni.me [6.40am]*yawns*
080905
sports carnival + national day celebrations today at bedok stadium.met muni at 6.40am n took a slow walk there.i felt so sick.woke up on sat n felt like i was dying.still wen to the carnival..my last yr in sec sch.i wont miss it.heh.took part in my event n we were 1ST!!!hahahah..got a medal for tt.so cool.hah.at least i won 1st place in sec n pri sch.woo hoo.wth.anyway,i was in bakhita this yr.n we were 2nd.woo hoo.heh.after tt,sa n jo came over.we all had a shower,changed n i wen to the docs,mum forced me too.lets see,temperature 38.3,ear infection,bad throat n runnin nose.n i still wen out.hah.gd ah.den we met rachie n left for roxy square.look,look,see,see den shared a cab to heeren.it was shoppin day for grad nite.gd shoppin.walked to heeren,taka,wisma,ck tang.by 8pm+,i felt like i was gonna faint.took a cab back.i cldnt take it.came home,took e medication which was drowsy n it knocked me out.pics from sports carnival n today...look up at the screen.
090805
national day.n im sick.i so wanted to go watch fireworks.darn.next yr.heh.i was thinkin back to this day last yr.hah.i was questionin myself.y didnt i go?damn it.hahah.bleah..i juz spend today,sleepin n takin mediation.it really sucks.no sch tmr n ive got lots to do.n actually planned this hols to study n i can barely stay awake for 30mins.e only time i know if im really sick is if drowsy medication knock me out.if it doesnt,means im not really sick.hahah.this time,within 5 mins im off to lala land.i hate takin those kind of medication,i feel so weak,giddy,lousy.
TO YOU:
ALWAYS REMEMBER THIS-
EVERY MOMENT, SOMEONE IS LOVING YOU.
AND THAT PERSON IS ME.
I'M LOVING YOU HONESTLY, TRUTHFULLY AND
WITH MY ENTIRE WHOLE HEART AND SOUL.<3



Monday, August 01, 2005; 8:22 PM

I CANT TAKE THIS ANYMORE.
IM F*ED UP WITH EVERYTHING RELATING TO SCH.
HOMEWORK.
STUDIES.
TUTORIALS.
PRACTICALS.
LESSONS.
STUDYING.
I WANNA SCREAM!
N YOU SEEM TO BE THE FURTHEST AWAY FROM ME NOW WHEN I ACTUALLY NEED YOU THE MOST NOW.
HAVE I DONE ANYTHING WRONG?
TELL ME IF I HAVE.
I REALLY NEED YOU NOW.
MORE THAN EVER.
CONSTANT POUNDING HEADACHES ARE KILLING ME.
I CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE.
THEY SEEM TO BE A DAILY ROUTINE WHICH I ENDURE EVERYDAY.
EVERYTHING AROUND ME SEEMS TO BE SPINNING.
EVERYTHING AROUND ME SEEMS TO BLURRY.
I REALLY DONT KNOW HOW MUCH OF THIS I CAN TAKE.
YES,YOU SAY IM AN OPTIMIST.
BUT I DO HAVE A BREAKING POINT.
IM ONLY HUMAN.
YES,MY TOLERANCE AND PATIENCE LEVEL IS HIGH.
BUT THERE ARE JUST TIMES WHEN I CANT TAKE IT.
I TOLERATE WHATEVER YOU HAVE THROWN TO ME.
I NEVER MADE NOISE ABOUT IT.
BUT HOW MUCH CAN ONE TAKE?
THE SILENT PAIN THAT IS KILLING ME SLOWLY BUT SURELY DEEP INSIDE.